by Kimberly Huang-Boruta —
I am 33 years old and started judo a year ago. I have done competitive swimming and a few other sports and though I was always interested in learning a martial art, I felt it was out of reach. However, the birth of my first child changed my mind.
When my daughter Victoria was born, I lost myself taking care of her. Every minute of every day was devoted to her and our home, I felt guilty doing anything else. When I thought about doing a past hobby or activity, I felt I was being a bad mom because my life should now be totally devoted to Victoria. As the year went by, despite the joy and happiness that Victoria brought to our lives, my husband Danny saw that something was wrong. He encouraged me to do something for myself so I tried doing my old hobbies but they made me sadder because they reminded me of my previous life where I did not have many responsibilities.
A few months passed by, Victoria was getting cuter and cuter but I wasn’t much happier so Danny suggested trying something new and I thought of martial arts. I originally wanted to do BJJ but he didn’t like that it was mostly on the ground so he suggested judo and found IJC. It was close by and they had a kids class so we joked that I might be too small for the adult class and they’ll put me with the kids. Nevertheless, I signed up for the (adult) trial classes near the end of September of last year.
I was very nervous when I stepped into the dojo. It was quite intimidating, hearing bodies being thrown and seeing everyone dressed in their gis. Aren gave me my gi and Maddie showed me how to tie my belt. Sensei EJ made sure I knew how to fall properly so I practiced ukemi my first two classes. Then I started learning grips and o-soto-gari with the other white belts. When I asked for help or if I looked bewildered, a Sensei or a higher belt would guide me and then let me try by myself. It was a supportive environment but not coddling as it is expected you do your best and work hard.
During the next few weeks and months, there were so many times I was doing my best and it felt like it wasn’t enough. So many times I had thought why can’t I get this? Why can’t I pin him down? Why am I here? But something changed, I was no longer thinking solely of Victoria and my responsibilities. I wasn’t feeling guilty, I was doing something new, exciting, and demanding. I was talking about it to my friends and couldn’t stop thinking about class for hours after it ended. Focusing only on judo for one hour a week helped me break out of my old pattern. I realized and believed that I could do something for myself and it was ok.
As I continued coming, I saw myself getting a little better and I couldn’t stop talking about what I learned in class. One night, I tried o-soto-gari on my husband and he lost his balance! He and his twin brother Mike joined a month later. I met great people and made new friends. I have never done a sport where I would always leave happy or glad that I came even after a frustrating class. And I am very grateful someone was always willing to help or practice with me and there was no judgment that I was a small white belt! I look forward to enrolling Victoria in IJC in the hope she will find as much joy as we do in judo and the amazing IJC community.