by Jeannie L – Judo Parent & Athlete
I was raised in a house where hard work and a contribution to the community were a way of life. My father worked 13-hour days, seven days a week, for thirteen years until I was a young teen. I never saw my dad complain or look for praise. He didn’t talk about being strong, because he just was. My mother was the same. She was a steady, reliable force of commitment to the family and to my hometown. She regularly guided my brother and me to work hard, not just for ourselves but for the benefit of our community.
In my family, working hard and giving back wasn’t special. It wasn’t something you broadcast for attention or shared online. It was just what you did. As a parent, I care very much about imparting these values to my child so that he can benefit from them and learn to follow a purpose-driven life that is full and complete. My greatest hope is that these values cultivate a moral compass in him so that he truly knows what is right and wrong, and what is honest, peace-loving, and kind in a world full of noise, chaos, and conflict.
When I read Jigoro Kano’s words in his writings about using judo to better yourself and help others, I feel like I’m hearing the same values I grew up with through a different voice. It speaks to my lifelong practice and pursuit of challenge, discipline, responsibility, and continuous improvement. Jigoro Kano created judo in hopes of spreading physical education, mental education, and moral education. It’s an unquestionable decision, and a quality, thoughtful choice as a parent to have my child learn judo at a school where I see Jigoro Kano’s values being manifested.
I love judo as a judoka myself. Through the years, I have learned it is entirely possible to do judo after having kids — or even after a serious sports surgery. I don’t compete, but one of my proudest accomplishments is that I have become proficient enough to be a helpful training partner in general. Whether I am working with a day-one white belt or a fellow brown belt, I vibe on “mutual benefit” or jita kyoei every practice.
In our home, effort matters more than outcome. We don’t complain unless we’re using it to learn or improve. We don’t dwell on insecurities or failure; they come and go. Instead, we maximize our mental energies to reflect, process, adapt, and keep going. To create a healthy balance, we also know to rest well and keep up the fun and joy. We know there is a certain amount of failure and struggle, but on the other side is building confidence and resilience with great coaches and a team. These are the most important character traits I could ever hope my child learns from martial arts and sport. Confidence and resilience are critical to doing your best in every aspect of life.
Judo gives me a way to pass the family values I grew up with to my son through everyday good habits, where action speaks louder than words. On the mat, he learns that quality effort matters more than outcome. He learns to get up when he falls, to listen and participate fully, to take accountability, and to support others. He learns that improvement comes from consistency, not shortcuts.
When he trains judo, I see the same fire my parents lit in me. And that’s the legacy I’m building with him — one throw or fall at a time.